The one and only

I miss him every day. Every single day. It’s more than 2 weeks ago now. He fell asleep in my arms, calm and heavy.

The vet told us we made the right choice, that 12 years, 6 months and 17 days is “the dream” when it comes to dogs and their age. I know that I had to give him up soon, that he was here on borrowed time. But as I have said before, all I wish for is a little bit more time with him.

The hard thing is that I still plan him in my day. Every day I think “oh, I have to hurry home now coz I been away for more than 6 hours...” and then I have to remind myself that I actually don’t need to. I don’t need to go home.

My dad told me that I would soon see the benefits of not having him around, that I would have more time to myself. Don’t get me wrong, I know that I don’t have to make time for him, but the thing is, I never did. He was just always there, and he was a part of my life that I loved. Of course there where days where it was hard to be able to give him all the time that he needed, but I tried to make up to it the day after, or the day before that if I knew that I would be late home on beforehand.

What I’m saying is, he wasn’t using my time. He gave me time. Time to think about what to do with my life on all does long walks. He was the one how gave me time to reflect over my schoolwork or future. He was also the one who made me do something to do, even if I was sick or sad.

Especially sad. Oh gosh, I have been sad so many times, and he has always been there.  Just by my side. And I would touch his soft ears and feel a little bit better.

He was loved, and still is, by so many people. There are pictures of him and so many people, even people who doesn’t like dogs, usually liked him or at least didn’t hate him.

He was the best first dog anyone could ask for. He will always be with me and I am so happy that he is free from all the pain he had in his joints and I’m happy that I got to have him for 7 years. I hope I get to see him sometime again. 

I love you Bamse. Sleep tight. And promise to come visit me in my dreams.